You have just dropped the children off, handed them back, and now you are looking forward to the next occasion when you can see the children. Rather than waiting for the next contact session to come round, start planning what you can do with them in the meantime. Obviously, where you have contact will influence what you can do, but here are a few ideas to get you started.

In a Contact Centre

Keeping a child’s attention on anything, depending on age can be a struggle. Contact the centre in advance and see if you can bring in toys or activities that you know are suitable for your child. Or, if you know your child loves reading, bring a book that you can read together. Gluing and sticking pictures together is a pastime which children of all ages enjoy and adults can join in, too.

Perhaps, bring some pictures along, of yourself, favourite animals, things that your child likes to do or eat. Try to gather these together over the period in between sessions, cutting them out of magazines or printing off pictures when you see them. Put them into a bag with a big bit of paper or card. Help your child put together a collage of these pictures. This is also a good way of encouraging your child to open up about any concerns that they could have, and, it also helps you keep in touch with your child’s likes and dislikes. (For more information, read our article Joint Projects To Help You Bond with Your Child on this site.)

Away From the Contact Centre

If you have the opportunity to take your children away from the contact centre you can plan what you and the kids do in advance. Ask them what they would like to do, or, if you have a particular idea you think they might be interested in ask them, they are sure to give you an opinion! This means that you and the kids know what you are doing, giving both of you stability and something to look forward to. Drama workshops, story times at local libraries and other activities don’t have to cost money if you are careful and do your research in advance. The park will always get a good reaction and you can take some bread to feed any local ducks.

Contact Overnight or for Longer Periods

This is the time where you get extended contact with your children and you should enjoy all the time you can have with them. However, it is not always games and activities that you have to plan. There might be occasions where your children have homework to do and things to get ready for school, such as projects. These have to be prioritised above other activities, and helping your child with homework can be just as rewarding as ‘more fun’ activities.

Talk with your children about what they would like to do in advance; again, activities don’t have to cost much or any money. A picnic on the carpet in the house is just as much fun as outside, especially if you get their help in the food preparation and packing into a bag. Camping in the garden or camping inside is another option.

Remember

Spending quality time with your children does not have to be expensive. Planning in advance what you can do with your children gives you both stability and something to think about and look forward to during the next contact session. That is not to say you cannot surprise them with a different activity or game that you have come up with. You don’t have to make the intervening period stretch out in front of you. Time spent without your children does not mean you can’t involve them every day in what you do and plan.